01 09 10 Tweet Dietitians Eat Chocolate Too: Made Up Conditions or Saturday Morning Cartoons: Candida and Friends

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Made Up Conditions or Saturday Morning Cartoons: Candida and Friends

Kelly MacLean you are my hero for this comment: 

"Ever notice that you don't meet poor people with special diet needs? A gluten intolerant house cleaner? A cab driver with Candida? Candida is what I call a rich, white person problem. You know you've really made it in this world when you get Candida."

A while ago I read what I thought was a pretty good book on food allergies until 3 pages in it was a, “let’s not eat anything with soy, corn, gluten, egg, dairy, or cooked.”  I chose to not offend the author so we’ll let the title go. 

I also used to really like the website: Mind Body Green until they had ‘nutritionists’ and uber unscientific holistic folks who are a bit too raw, gluten free, and kind of anorexic looking.  I believe in integrated medicine but a post about ‘lasagna’ which is really raw zucchini planks posing as lasagna noodles and grinding up cashews to make ‘nut cheese’ (laugh like a ten year old just do it) is a bit too far out there for my liking.  Actually, it makes me want to send them a year supply of Doritos to scare them out of their Birkenstocks. 

The following things are rubbish.  As I spent a highly scientific amount of time researching it (actually 10 seconds per topic on Google Scholar which is good enough, I already know the answers but we tend to believe those who have a $300 Lululemon outfit on).

Please keep in mind, there is a lot of stupid stuff on the internet. 

Also remember that if it didn’t kill your great-grandmother it probably won’t kill you so much. 

Candida: it’s really Candidiasis.  It’s basically a yeast infection that can be in various parts OUTSIDE of the body.  Only one reported case was there of bro  who had basically Brewer’s Yesast in his stomach and after eating carbs he actually got intoxicated because he was his own microbrew, it’s on NPR.  Your stomach has hydrochloric acid in it.  That’s serious stuff.  It kills just about everything.  So there’s a 99.9% chance your mood swings, weight gain, or whatever your holistic nutritionist is trying to tell you about not eating bread (which will probably give you more mood swings, etc.) that is really causing your symptoms. 

Solution: If you feel bloated after eating foods with gluten, cut down on your portions.  90% of people are bloated coming out of the Olive Garden.  If you have more complicated stuff going on see your doctor, an actual M.D. or D.O.

Vegetables are LOADED with protein.  Not so fast.  The following things have some kind of protein (non-animal sources): beans 10-12 g per half-cup; rice ~4-5 g per ½ cup cooked, soy beans (edamame), about 7-10 g per ½ cup; and about ¼ cup of nuts will buy you anywhere between 3-7 g.
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Pus in milk.  Really?  We have to go all PETA on milk?  OK so here is a super nerd article on the cells in bovine milk.  Fine: http://journals.cambridge.org/action/displayAbstract?fromPage=online&aid=5130052, my current theory is that if you do you best financially to avoid rBST free milk (organic ain't cheap sister), you should be fine.